A Word To The Wise

McCampaign may want to take some tips from Dana Carvey about post-debate spin on Friday morning.

Bailout Goes Down In Flames

Boehner says that because of hurt feelings the Republicans just had to put their party first.

Here are Pelosi's remarks. Pretty straightforward stuff, I'd say.

Here's the roll call. Kagen and Flyin' Jim both voted "No."

Do You Remember?

Last week John McCain said he was going to stop campaigning until a deal was reached to solve the financial crisis his guys helped to create.

Whatever happened with that? He stopped campaigning for what, twenty minutes?

I'm Sorry. I'm Not Sure I Heard That Right.

Did they say it will start with, "Only," 250 billion dollars?

Only?

Mighty Mouse Misfires

Let me get this straight.

A deal was in place, just needing to be shined up to bring to a vote, when John McCain drifted into Washington for his first vote since April, bullied GWB into a high profile publicity stunt, introduced a plan already rejected by all but the most hardened wingers in his party and busted the deal all to hell.

And then accused someone else of politicizing the debate. At least Mitt Romney would have had a clue about useful solutions.

Unrecommended Campaign Tactics

OMG.

A publicity stunt by an underdog in the race to be governor of Bangkok went
badly wrong when her campaign manager drowned as they bathed in a canal to
highlight the plight of residents who have no access to clean water.

Media Bias! Media Bias!

Look, look, look! It's clearly there. The media is biased. How else can you explain this headline?

Beltran helps Mets keep pace with Brewers

It's clear that Yahoo wants the Mets to win or they'd have listed the Brewers first. Of course, it would have helped if the Crew hadn't suspended their campign for most of last week.

I'm Not Sure I'll Care About This, Either.

SHARON Bush still wants her pound of flesh. President Bush's former
sister-in-law, who was dumped by his brother, Neil, several years ago for
another woman, has teamed up with best-selling author and lawyer Mark Smith
to pen "Bushology," a none-too-flattering look inside the Bush
dynasty.

Neil has always, always been the "fun" Bush. Whether it's been for his Moonie ties, his Ritalin rants with Lisa Marie, or his "educational" software that uses white guy rap to teach math, Neil has been good for a giggle or two. But it doesn't look as if he's laughing now.

Apparently the word is out, as Sharon already got a call from her
ex-husband, who's said to be furious about the exposé.

Ain't It Just Like A Blister?

To show up after the hard work is done.

McCain's pledge to swoop like some sort of untrammeled bird into Washington and "Solve The Problem" reminded Sven of this.

Double "L" Loser. A Morality Tale.

The guy lives in Fargo.

He stole a beer truck for himself.

But he got it stuck in the mud down by the river.

And it was empty.

And his buddy rolled over on him.

Premanufactured Opinions

When you see those letters glowingly supporting John McCain in the Gazette and the Journal in the next few weeks remember this.

The assignment is simple: We are going to write letters to the editor
and we are allowed to make up whatever we want -- as long as it adds to the
campaign. After today we are supposed to use our free moments at home to create
a flow of fictional fan mail for McCain. "Your letters," says Phil Tuchman,
"will be sent to our campaign offices in battle states. Ohio. Pennsylvania.
Virginia. New Hampshire. There we'll place them in local newspapers."

Place them? I may be wrong, but I thought that in the USA only a
newspaper's editors decided that.

"We will show your letters to our supporters in those states,"
explains Phil. "If they say: 'Yeah, he/she is right!' then we ask them to sign
your letter. And then we send that letter to the local newspaper. That's how we
send dozens of letters at once."

No newspaper can refuse a stream of articulate expressions of
support, is the thought behind it. "This way, we will always get into some
letters column."

It is the day after Sarah Palin's speech at the Republican
convention. Today, she is our main subject. The others are already
enthusiastically hammering their keyboards. I am struggling with a tiny writer's
block. "Dear Editor ..."

There's plenty more

What's The Difference? III

What's the difference between John "Haircut" Edwards and John "Celebrity" McCain?

$5183.43

McCain paid the 2002 beauty-school grad $5,583.43 for her services,
according to the Federal Election Commission.

Cool. Don't you wish you'd sent Senator Straight Talk 20 bucks out of your pay envelope?

Happy To Have Been A Part Of This

This citizen input portion of the planning for this may have been the first time I got involved in town government.

The city will celebrate the new park's opening with a ribbon cutting
ceremony at 2:45 p.m. Saturday. The park is on Sixth Street between Porter Road
and Main Street.

The park sprouted from a donation of more than 10 acres from
developers Roger Berg, Robbie Petterson and Phil Woodworth. The city later
bought more than 4 acres to make a 15-acre park, Ringhand said.

Who knew it would turn out so well.

Thanks to the scores of people who have worked on this over the last ten years.

She Stoled It

MoDo stole my MoJo.

How the mighty 85-year-old Henry the K has fallen from his days chasing Jill
St. John and running the world to his hour briefing of a 44-year-old Wasilla
hockey mom who may end up running the world.

I'll forgive her, though, just for coining "apocalipstick."

It’s sort of like villagers in those old movies who bring in the
wizened witch doctor to shake a stick over them.

Wow! I Don't Care

Clay? yawn

Lindsay? over

Now, Fred! Now you can say, "Jim. You just don't care. Admit it."

And I will.

Cause And Effect?

I hope not.

There was a Corvette convertible parked in front of the chiropractor's office last night.

Philosophy Question

If a hooky-playing hockey mom meets foreign leaders in a vacuum can anyone defend her?

It Came In Over The Transom

Too true to be good. From The Nation.

Dear American:

I need to ask you to support an urgent secret business relationship
with a transfer of funds of great magnitude.

I am Ministry of the Treasury of the Republic of America. My
country has had crisis that has caused the need for large transfer of funds of
800 billion dollars US. If you would assist me in this transfer, it would be
most profitable to you.

I am working with Mr. Phil Gram, lobbyist for UBS, who will be my
replacement as Ministry of the Treasury in January. As a Senator, you may know
him as the leader of the American banking deregulation movement in the 1990s.
This transactin is 100% safe.

There's more. h/t sven in jay's combox

If You Want People To Stop Calling You A Liar

You need to stop telling lies.

Sen. John McCain’s top campaign aides convened a conference call today to
complain of being called “liars.” They pressed the media to scrutinize specific
elements of Sen. Barack Obama’s record.

But the call was so rife with simple, often inexplicable misstatements of fact
that it may have had the opposite effect: to deepen the perception, dangerous to
McCain, that he and his aides have little regard for factual
accuracy.

My brother says that if enough people tell you that you look sick you should probably lie down. I think McCampaign needs a timeout.

Heard It On The TeeVee

What's the difference between Sarah Palin on the Environment and George Bush on the Environment?

Lipstick