Sunday, March 12, 2006

It's More Than A Little Disconcerting

Last Tuesday I had to go for what the doctor calls "a procedure." Nothing extreme or painful, just one of the perks of a cardinal birthday.

Twenty four hours of mildly nasty prep and an early arrival at the hospital. Stripped down to sneakers, an open-back robe and my wedding ring. IV in the back of my right hand, heart monitors glued to chest and abdomen (not in the spots they shaved for the stress test dammit), "Relax, deep breaths," blood pressure cuff around the left upper arm, oxygen monitor on left forefinger, "Just relax. We'll start a demarol drip in the IV so you don't feel any pain and then after you talk with the doctor we'll start the anasthetic." Oxygen line draped over my ears and into my nose, the doctor's voice soothing in my ear. A few instructions, "Just relax. We'll turn on the radio. Just listen to the music."

Good idea. Soothing music. Just relax. WTF!

The radio is playing Sarah McLachlan.

"In the arms of the angel,

fly away from here,

from this dark, cold..."


I woke up in recovery about an hour later. Everything is fine.

4 comments:

Casper said...

That's freakin' hilarious.

Nathan said...

It could have been worse Jim - Lee Greenwood, for example.

grumps said...

Stop it. You're scaring me now.

Nathan said...

Interestingly I've heard that he's updated his hit "Proud to Be An American" to better fit the times. The biggest change is in the chorus...it's become "I'm proud to be an american, where at least I'm told I'm free..." You should hear it - it's moving!