Wednesday, December 16, 2009

And The Grinch's Heart Grew Three Sizes That Day

Tracy is right. If this doesn't bring a tear to your eye then you are a hard one, indeed. Ladies and Gentlemen, I give you The Guerilla Handbell Strikeforce.

Thanks, Tracy

Predictions (How Did He Do In '09?)

Everybody does a prediction list. Here's a few of mine for O-Nine. Let's check the record. This list published 12/30/08

Jeff Wood will find out what the real meaning of "Independent" is. He and Joe Lieberman will form a club that gets together to throw stones at pictures of John McCain and Mark Pocan. He'll not be resigning.
Both Wood and Lieberman are feeling the lonesome right now but Wood is steadfastly doing the wrong thing so, call it 50/50.

Mexico will be declared a "Failed State" and the State Department will issue travel warnings to American tourists to avoid Guadalajara and Nuevo Laredo.
I missed this one but only on a technicality. I guess the President doesn't have to be able to speak Spanish to do good things along the border. 0%

Brett Favre plays another season starting in August after waffling for 4 months.
He signed the contract on 8/16. 100%

Colin Farrel's eyebrows will get a three picture deal of their own. At the conclusion of the third film it will be learned that the right eyebrow really wants to direct.
Too soon to tell. Farrell did 4 films in 2009 and I bet you can't name one of them. Might as well be true but 0%

Norm Coleman gets to trial before Blagojevich, neither in 2009.
Not wrong, not yet. No trials for either one and Coleman is looking bullet-proof on the DMT charges. I heard he's talking with Jethro Tull about getting back with the band on the road.

Scott Walker starts runnning for Governor. Again. No one in Barron, Pepin or Iron Counties knows who he is. Again.
96% Of course he's running again. He's a career politician. But now there's a guy up in Mercer who got an email from his brother-in-law in Pewaukee about Scott. The guy in Mercer still thinks he's a utility infielder for the Brew Crew.

No Triple Crown winner this year, either.
Some of these just aren't that tough. 100%

Newsbuster's #1 story of 2009? President Obama's Selective Service record. Debbie Schlussel stakes her credibility on the story. The ghost of Jessica Savitch can be heard laughing if you stand really still.
It's always hard to tell with NB but it looks as if the big story is, Science Is Hard. 0%

Hollywood will be stunned by the death of a young star in a traffic accident. Drugs will be involved. Everyone will say they saw it coming.
I've got two weeks but it's not looking good. 0%

Barbara Lawton gets a Golden Ticket to Washington. And you thought Doyle was just asking for money.
Wow! Almost as wrong as Jerry Bader 0%

Bob Sanders and Mike Stock will join the job market right after New Year's Day.
Sanders and 5 more on 1/5. Stock retired on 1/17. Call that 100%

A new basic cable TV franchise will start starring a 15 year-old serial killer named Hannibal Montana. Roger Ebert will love it. Siskel? Not so much.
Not a worse premise than Accidentally, On Purpose but wrong

Rose Fernandez will run a campaign steeped in ACM money. WEAC spends so much on ads against her that they are only a minor player in the SCoW race.
I'm thinking that this was close enough to call my way.

Brewers? 83-79.
80-82 Missed it by a homestand. 96.4%

In 2009 we will not see an effort to reinstate the Fairness Doctrine or the The Assault Weapons Ban at the Federal level. That won't stop the incessant drumbeats.
Like I said, almost too easy. 100%

A minor scandal breaks out when it's discovered that American Idol has been using the same twelve contestants for the last four years and no one has noticed. It turns out that David Archuletta was just Taylor Hicks with the hair color out.
Prove I'm wrong. I dare you.

Fred Thompson's radio show has a shorter run than The Texas Wheelers when Grampy just can't be bothered to do two hours a day. Mike Huckabee's show will rattle around on the ABC schedule without reaching a single listener until April. When it does find an audience it will fail.
I was wrong about Grampy. He's plugging along with a couple hundred AM stations and you can follow him on Twitter. As for Huck; I'm just sorry I missed the episode where he jammed with Danny Aiello's band. 0%

Supreme Court Justice Gabelman wins his case that confirms his right to make stuff up in campaign commercials regardless of the facts. He wins a major year-end award from a Burlington civic group.
Sadly, 100%

Madonna gets new boy toys in January, March, June, July and October. Oprah and Steadman don't tie the knot.
My little clicker-counter is busted but I'm call it confirmed.

Abrahamson retains her seat by 52-48.
The Badger Herald called it 60-40. Koschnick was an even bigger hump than we thought

The number of bloggers falls just as the GOP makes up their mind to start putting them to good use. Sean Hackbarth gets to pop each of them on the back of the head and call them, "Dummy." Just once.
I hope this was true. The GOP New Media campaign has been very very amusing this year.

Well, what did you think was going to happen?
I'm calling it 12/20 with a split on the embarrassment that is Jeff Wood. 60% ain't that bad. Predictions for 2010 will be out soon.

They're So Cute When They're Literary

Bachmann forgets her history at Code Red rally and calls for the kind of concerted effort that lost the Battle at Balaclava.

What did the French Marshal Pierre Bosquet have to say about the slaughter he had just witnessed?

"C'est magnifique, mais ce n'est pas la guerre. C'est de la folie"

("It is magnificent, but it is not war. it is madness.") That sums up Bachmann's efforts nicely.

"Forward, the Light Brigade!"

Was there a man dismay'd?

Not tho' the soldier knew

Someone had blunder'd:

Theirs not to make reply,

Theirs not to reason why,

Theirs but to do and die:

Into the valley of Death

Rode the six hundred.

Friday, December 11, 2009

Christmas Movie Faves

What are your favorite Christmas movies; not necessarily the best or most heartwarming, but the ones you love to watch?

I offer these in no particular order.

A Christmas Story
Over the years I got to be quite a connoisseur of soap. My personal
preference was for Lux, but I found Palmolive had a nice, piquant after-dinner
flavor - heady, but with just a touch of mellow smoothness. Life Buoy, on the
other hand...
It's Christmas Eve. It's-it's the one night of the year when we all act a
little nicer, we-we-we smile a little easier, we-w-w-we-we-we cheer a little
more. For a couple of hours out of the whole year we are the people that we
always hoped we would be.

Love, Actually
Whenever I get gloomy with the state of the world, I think about the
arrivals gate at Heathrow Airport. General opinion's starting to make out that
we live in a world of hatred and greed, but I don't see that. It seems to me
that love is everywhere. Often, it's not particularly dignified or newsworthy,
but it's always there - fathers and sons, mothers and daughters, husbands and
wives, boyfriends, girlfriends, old friends. When the planes hit the Twin
Towers, as far as I know, none of the phone calls from the people on board were
messages of hate or revenge - they were all messages of love. If you look for
it, I've got a sneaking suspicion... love actually is all around.

Mr Magoo's Christmas Carol
Ringle, ringle, coins when they jingle, make such a lovely sound. Give them
away and nobody can rob you.

Carol For Another Christmas
Each behind his own fence! Each behind his own barricade! Follow me,
my friends and loved ones, to the perfect society! The Civilization of ‘I’!

Sunday, December 06, 2009

Irony May Not Be Dead, After All

This morning I was working through the readings for my Ethics class which differentiate the seven forms of Distributive Justice when it came to me that I was sitting next to the Christmas Tree.
What a wonderful little moment.

Wednesday, December 02, 2009

God, I Miss Lewis Grizzard (With thanks to Wiggy for reminding me)

'The Dope Fairy'
City Councilman James Bond of Atlanta

Years ago in Atlanta there was a City Councilman named James Bond. This was NOT 007. That was James IQ, unfortunately enough.

More unfortunately enough however, somebody broke into James' car and ripped out his stereo and Atlanta Police investigated. Lo and behold, what did they find? Nine of 'em! Left handed Luckies, ladies and Gentlemen. Somebody in there smokin 'em! One of 'em in there freshly rolled right in the back seat.
So I placed a call into APD HQ, "Chief? Lewis Grrizzard, Atlanta Journal Constitution. When are you going to press charges against Councilman Bond for Felony Possession of Marijuana?"

Chief said, "We are not going to do that."

I said "What? Well who's in there smokin that dope?"

"We say the thief was!"

"The thief???? This is a rookie job. First time offender. Never pulled a job like this in his life. How longis it gonna take to rip out a car stereo. Half hour? 45 minutes? Do you think this guy has time to smoke nine joints in 30 to 45 minutes and then rip out Councilman Bond's car stereo and then have the physical strength to leave the scene of the crime? Did he leave a joint in the back seat for the next thief? What is going on here?"

Now you see my dilemma. "Well if it wasn't councilman Bond, Chief, or the thief, there is only one other explanation. The Dope Fairy."

What kind of town is Atlanta? 25,000 calls came into WSB the next day 'Where is that dope fairy? I wanna talk to him!'

(Lewis Grizzard) (A Great American)

h/t James Wigderson

Tuesday, December 01, 2009

Things Change

Remember when getting driving advice from John Daly was something good?

Remember when hacked emails were a cause for an uproar?

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

What Happens When You Incite The Mob?

The FBI is investigating whether anti-government sentiment led to the hanging
death of a U.S. Census worker
near a Kentucky cemetery. A law
enforcement official told The Associated Press the word 'fed" was scrawled on
the dead man's chest.

The body of Bill Sparkman, a 51-year-old part-time
Census field worker and teacher, was found Sept. 12 in a remote patch of the
Daniel Boone National Forest in rural southeast Kentucky. The Census has
suspended door-to-door interviews in rural Clay County, where the body was
found, pending the outcome of the investigation.

Updated 11/24: As an alert reader has pointed out, police have now ruled Sparkman's death a suicide. Investigators did note that anti-government sentiment had a part in the death, if only as being a danger perceived by Sparkman.

Now police believe that Sparkman had staged his death.

Investigators said that prior to his death Bill Sparkman had talked about suicide and also about anti-government sentiment in the rural area where he worked.

This is a tragic story no matter the cause.

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Because It Makes Me Happy

All the stapler scenes at once.

"You're going to have to talk to Payroll about that."

Friday, November 13, 2009

Maybe we're being too hard on the little Chucklehead. Webster does offer the following a a definition for "career."

3 : a field for or pursuit of consecutive progressive achievement especially in public, professional, or business life

Now we need to work around the small P "progressive" here because neither Neumann nor Walker will ever be accused of advocating Progressive policies. In this case it simply means "progressing from one to another."

As so many have pointed out, Walker doesn't really HAVE a field of consecutive achievement as a politician. He's fumbled around in it for 16 of his 42 years on the planet but "achievement" may be stretching the mark. His willingness to play games with his employee's own careers shows just how unfit for service he is.

So maybe we just give in to Young Kyle. After all, he's been to blogger camp and he must know something to be given the prestigious award as best blogger by AFP.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

Walker Continues His March To The Fringes

Walker Courts Palin Endorsement
Palin last month endorsed Doug Hoffman, a third-party conservative candidate
seeking a New York congressional seat in a special election. Republican Dede
Scozzafava then dropped out of the race and last week Democrat Bill Owens won,
capturing a seat that had been held by Republicans for more than 100 years.
Nonetheless, other Republican candidates nationally have sought her

Nonetheless, indeed.

Proctor Asks

If one synchronized swimmer drowns are the rest obligated?

Wednesday, November 11, 2009

Remember and Honor

A good home for your charitable dollars.
Badger Honor Flight is a hub of the national Honor Flight Network, a
volunteer organization created solely to honor America's veterans for all their
sacrifices. We transport our heroes to Washington, D.C. to give them the
opportunity to visit and reflect at their memorials. Top priority is given to
the most senior veterans - World War II survivors - along with any terminally
ill veteran. Veterans from other conflicts, such as the Korean and Vietnam Wars,
are included in our program and will be given priority in the near

Deep Thought

You wouldn't take your dog to a vet who hated animals or trust your child to pediatrician who hated kids.

So why would you elect a Governor who hates government?

Tuesday, November 10, 2009

Well Armed Citizens Protect Neighborhood From Invasion By Pink Elephants

Here's one of those stories they tell us we never hear about. Two Janesville men saved their neighborhood Sunday night but an ungrateful, jack-booted Police force took away their right to have guns in their homes.
53-year-old Paul Botsford and 35-year-old Matthew Splinter have been
arrested on chages including Endgangering Safety by the Intoxicated Use of a
Police say while responding to multiple reports of shots being fired
shortly after midnight Sunday, officers were greeted to the sounds of gunfire on
Hamilton Avenue. Police accuse the suspects of firing dozens of shots from a
home's second story window. They say at least one other home was hit by

Friday, November 06, 2009

Michael Explains RepubliCare

Michael Feldman explains it all.

4. Under RepubliCare small businesses will be empowered to band together to form multi-national conglomerates with interlocking directorates, the better to lobby against Big Government Mandates showered on employees lucky to be working at all in this Democrat economy. RepubliCare will cover 90% of the already insured.

9. Individuals already sick do not qualify for benefits since this is, after all, Health Insurance. Those seeking Sick Insurance might try Aflac.

Read the rest.

Thursday, November 05, 2009

Why Don't Their Heads Explode?

When the Bachmannistas get together to rally against the government, to call as she does for Jeffersonian Revolution, to call the President evil and the Senate and House Leadership Socialists, how then do they pledge allegiance to that government with a straight face?

Are their civics so weak that the Pledge means nothing to them?
I pledge allegiance
(1) : the fidelity owed by a subject or citizen to a sovereign or government
to the flag of the United States of America and to the Republic
1 a (1) : a government having a chief of state who is not a monarch and who in modern times is usually a president
for which it stands
— stand for 1 : to be a symbol for
one nation, under God, indivisible
not divisible
with Liberty
d : the positive enjoyment of various social, political, or economic rights and privileges
and Justice
b (1) : the principle or ideal of just dealing or right action (2) : conformity to this principle or ideal
for All.
2 : every member or individual component of

There is no separate Pledge for conservatives. We all live under and fight for the same flag, the same ideals, the same country. Don't march on Washington to deny Liberty and Justice for any or some and then claim you have a higher platform from which to preach. The Pledge doesn't offer special privileges to the loudest.

all definitions from

Friday, October 30, 2009

"If This Is Organized, We Suck," She said

The conservative grassroots (sic) drama machine implored the tea party crowd to jam the Capitol to protest the oppression of a California grandmother.
If You Are in Driving Distance of DC Tomorrow
Dear Fellow Tea Party Patriot,
According to Politico, tomorrow, Thursday, October 29 at 10:00 am, the
Democrats in the House plan to unveil the House Health Care Legislation. If you
are within driving distance of DC and are able to attend with signs in
opposition to government takeover of health care, we encourage you to do

No word if those without signs might be welcomed. First mistake.
Remember on the action list sent earlier today, tomorrow's action items are
to call your own Congressman plus the Blue Dogs in the House. Be sure to do this
so it coincides with the bill unveiling tomorrow.

"Tomorrow's Action Items?" That sort of makes grassroots unorganized political free market sound like an unholy alliance of you nagging Mom and the worst punch-list review ever.
Please forgive the extra email in your inboxes today. Since we are doing all
we can to leave no stone unturned, we felt it was necessary to send an extra
email today so those who can protest tomorrow are able to do so.

Only by bulk mailing email boxes was Thomas Jefferson able to yada yada...
You are the heart and soul of the Tea Party Movement. Thank you for
promoting the causes of fiscal responsibility, constitutionally limited
government, and free markets with us!

If you don't dress like Mel Gibson in that one movie and carry a Gadsden Flag, who will?
Your Tea Party Patriots National Coordinator Team,Debbie Dooley, Mike Gaske,
Kellen Giuda, Ryan Hecker, Jenny Beth Martin, Mark Meckler, Sally Oljar, Diana
Reimer, Billie Tucker, and Dawn Wildman

All actual grassrootsy people. No. Really.

So how many patriots answered the clarion call? 10,000? 60,000? 2.5 Million? About ten?
Joann Abbott, a grandmother from Northern Virginia, made the drive to
the protest this morning after seeing the email sent by Tea Party leaders last
night. When asked if she was part of the "flash mob," she laughed. "I'm here on
my own," she said, looking around at the scattered protesters around her. "If
this is organized, we suck."

Proving The Point

Let's just say for a moment that the fringe right is successful in electing the Palinista in NY23. Current thinking is that Doug Hoffman is singularly unprepared to govern in any way.

And there are some signs that Hoffman may be something of a Potemkin
candidate. He didn't show up at a radio debate last night. He was on the finance
committee of a hospital that
successfully lobbied for a federal earmark before becoming an anti-earmark champion. And he got eaten alive by a local paper editorial board last week after he wasn't prepared to answer questions about any of the issues facing the district.

If the best that the Conservative has to offer is bomb-throwers in the mold of Bachmann how long will it take for the public to get over them?

Tuesday, October 27, 2009

The Court Of Low Expectations

From The Cap Times Editorial Board:
The trio can form a court majority if they have Gableman in their
caucus and so they seem to be willing to neglect not just the complaints about
Gableman but the requirement that they be addressed in a judicious and
responsible manner.

We understand that Ziegler, who has had her own ethics problems, is not
inclined to seek or support a higher standard.

Halcyon Days, Indeed

Does anybody remember when Fred Thompson was going to save the Republican Party all by himself?

Saturday, October 24, 2009

Laissez le Schisme Commencer

More splits and splats in the GOP.

If you're the GOP candidate for Governor in one party and endorse the candidate of a different party for governor in another state, what does that say about either your commitment or the party's strength for the future?

Tiahrt says,
"The Republican Party will never again be a majority party until we regain
the confidence of the American people," said Tiahrt. "I believe there is room
for disagreement within the party and we should not have litmus tests.

He then goes on to apply his own litmus test.
However, the Republican nominee appears to have disavowed most conservative
principles that are important to a vast majority of Republican voters."

There are those who claim that 2010 will be a GOP year. Yet we have several prominent Republicans who can't buy into that meme. Why would they expect anyone else to buy into it?

Extra Credit Work: For Ten Points, who is Sean Parnell? No peeking.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Betting On Boxcars

It appears that the GOP's best hope for 2010 is riding on continued high rates of unemployment.

Let's have a slogan contest. How can Republican candidates best capture their fervent desire for more economic misery for America?

Life In Post-Racial America

Louisiana justice of the peace said he refused to issue a marriage
to an interracial couple out of concern for any
children the couple might have. Keith Bardwell, justice of the peace in
Tangipahoa Parish, says it is his experience that most interracial marriages
do not last long.
Keep trying, I guess.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

Which Is More Fun To Watch?

The silliness around the Nobel came and went pretty quickly. It was mostly just the usual suspects carping.

However, the apoplexy over Capitalism's rejection of the drug-addicted Rush Limbaugh has the potential to grow legs.

Just for the record, I believe that the sex-tourist, bad-satirist has just as much right to own a small slice of a losing NFL team as any other minor vanity investor. I'm just wondering how bad the judgement of the others in the deal was that they couldn't see this coming from a mile away.

Deep Thought

For the Drug Addict Rush Limbaugh to come out against making up quotes is probably against his self interest.

I'm Taking John And Giving The Points

Today's Line...Kate Plus Eight

In other mainstream media news...Why would Rushbo think that the NFL would allow a drug-abusing sex tourist to be a part owner? Don't they have enough troubles?

Wednesday, October 14, 2009

You Might Consider Making Lemonade

Not a great year for Conservative thinkers.

We've lost Bill Buckley, Irving Kristol and William Safire and gained What Up? and Going Rogue.

Friday, October 09, 2009

Who Decides Who Gets Treated?

Scott Walker thinks he does.
'You've got this amount of time; here's what we expect you to do; here's the
options you should have by that time.' So that there are clearly defined
expectations of how you're going to ease off assistance from the government,"
said Walker.

He wants to be the Decider of whether your neighbor gets treatment or not. Walker wants to lead the panel deciding who gets treated and who should just get better and stop whining.

Walker has picked a government policy that's sucessful and popular and come out against it. In the midst of the most comprehensive discussion of healthcare reform he's chosen to just say, "No," and stick with a broken platform.

Twice in the last week I've heard people in Rock County say that Scott Walker scares them. Walker thinks his problem is that people don't know what he stands for. I think he'll soon find out that's not his biggest problem.

It's All So Sudden

Congratulations are in order for President Obama. He may have, as the wingnuttery would have it, lost the Olympics single-handedly but he's brought home the Nobel Peace Prize. From the proclamation:
"For 108 years, the Norwegian Nobel Committee has sought to stimulate
precisely that international policy and those attitudes for which Obama is now
the world's leading spokesman. The Committee endorses Obama's appeal that 'Now is the time for all of us to take our share of responsibility for a global
response to global challenges.'

My first thought was, "How nice. Now GWB and Barry will have something to talk about at Old-Timer's day reunions in DC." But then, of course, I remembered that George never actually got around to promoting much worldwide peace.

How could Obama not have one this year with the bar set so low for the past eight years? One commenter at TPM shares,
"It sounds like the, 'boy is the world relieved you guys didn't choose
McCain' award."

Monday, October 05, 2009

Ask The Man Who Hired Her

You always knew it would come to this. Didn't you?
Schmidt said:"Most politicians of prominence write a book. My honest
view is that she would not be a winning candidate for president and if she was
the results would be...catastrophic. It's fairly inconceivable she could be

Friday, October 02, 2009

Twenty-Nine Years?

Happy birthday, Gentlemen.


Hear that? It's the sound of Joe Wilson's career sliding back into the ooze.

Thursday, October 01, 2009

Something Light

Nothing of portent today. I hope this can get the taste of Accidentally, On Purpose out of all of our mouths.

Wednesday, September 30, 2009


John Perry projects his stupid onto our military. He predicts a military coup.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

Chuck Norris Sez...

Make sure you desecrate that flag to show your patriotism.
[ ]then I suggest you fly some revolutionary flag in lieu of your
50-star flag over the next year. Post the 13-star Betsy Ross flag, Navy Jack or
Gadsden flag ("Don't Tread on Me") or any representation that tells the story of
Old Glory and makes a stand for our Founders' vision of America.

Of course, patriots know that the 50-star flag truly represents one
nation under God and our Founders' republic, but modernists simply don't get it.
So what do you say we make a statement by flying a different flag and educate
our neighbors when they ask us, "Why are you flying that flag instead of the
contemporary Stars and Stripes?" (If you insist on posting a modern USA
flag, too, then get one that is tea-stained
to show your solidarity
with our Founders.)

Because Chuck's friend Huck and the teabaggers want you to spend that $73.50 to get officially descrated flags.

Wednesday, September 23, 2009

Joe Mankiewicz On "Theater"

The Theatuh, the Theatuh - what book of rules says the Theater exists only
within some ugly buildings crowded into one square mile of New York City? Or
London, Paris or Vienna? Listen, junior. And learn. Want to know what the
Theater is? A flea circus. Also opera. Also rodeos, carnivals, ballets, Indian
tribal dances, Punch and Judy, a one-man band - all Theater. Wherever there's
magic and make-believe and an audience - there's Theater. Donald Duck, Ibsen,
and The Lone Ranger, Sarah Bernhardt, Poodles Hanneford, Lunt and Fontanne,
Betty Grable, Rex and Wild, and Eleanora Duse. You don't understand them all,
you don't like them all, why should you? The Theater's for everybody - you
included, but not exclusively - so don't approve or disapprove. It may not be
your Theater, but it's Theater of somebody, somewhere.

Bill Sampson said it in All About Eve. I say it's time for A Night At The Palace III.

Who wants to play?

Saturday, September 19, 2009

The Irony Wagon

Does anybody else think it odd that the death of a conservative Thinker like Irving Kristol could be observed with anything approaching dignity at a Tea Party whilst being harangued by Malkin on Talk Like A Pirate Day?

Well, I suppose her arguments are sort of half-avast.

Friday, September 18, 2009

I've Named My Flu Shot

I call it, "Joe Wilson."

After all, it's just a little prick that's temporarily puffed up and irritating but in a week or so I won't even remember it.

Thursday, September 17, 2009

And, I'd Say It Again

Nancy, not so very long ago we reached out to each other for a simple connection. Looking for conversation and kindness, we each found a friend. Across a hundred miles we wrote to one another about family, books, movies and music. We took time to feel each other out, to find the kernel of truth at the center of the words. We wrote about the important and the trivial things in our lives .

For weeks you knew me as grumps and I knew you as curious, skeptical. And then one day at the end of one of your messages you typed, “You can call me Nancy.”

Today I’m here in front of our friends and families to declare that I’ve come to know you as so much more than that.

You are my friend. With you I can share my thoughts, feelings, ideas and troubles. You laugh at my jokes, sometimes for the umpteenth time. You tease me when I go over the line. I promise to never take that friendship for granted but to nourish it, feed it and to let it grow.

You are my sounding board and my challenger. You help me make my life better by showing me ways to make it stronger. You listen and help me to edit. My day would be much poorer if I didn’t start it with you at the table. I promise to respect your ideas as you help me refine mine.

You are my safe harbor. You allow me space and offer comfort when I need it. You brought laughter and light back into my life when I was at my lowest. I promise you my fidelity, comfort and love in return.

You are my family. You have accepted and joined my family as it is and you have opened your family to me. I promise to cherish the relationships and values that they have given us and to instill them in our grandchildren.

You are my partner in life. We share discoveries and walk old familiar pathways together. We filter the world through each other’s eyes. I promise to nurture the sense of wonder that we share to the end of our days.

You are my wife. Those are the words that express my joy and my hope. You have made me a better man and I will love you forever because you did.

Nancy, I adore you. I promise, in front of all our family and friends, to love and to cherish, to comfort and honor, to share my life no matter what path it takes us on for as long as we live.

Happy Anniversary, Darling

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Irony Biscuit For The Tea Party Crowd

Which tree-hugging socialist communist weirdo said this?
We cannot learn from one another until we stop shouting at one another --
until we speak quietly enough so that our words can be heard as well as our

From his first Inaugural Address.

Yeah. I can't believe I used a pull-quote from him in class yesterday, either.

I'll Make You A Deal

I won't snigger when you say that Red Dawn is great film-making if you'll stop with the attendance nonsense.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

How To Identify The "Stupid People" Harwood Was Talking About

For the record, I had no problem with GHWB's address to schoolchildren.

Well. That's Pretty Clear.

House Rules Of Decorum
Members Must refrain from speaking disrepectfully of the Speaker, other
members, the President or the Vice-President.

Up until last night that worked pretty well.

Now can we dispense with that "Higher Standard" guff that wingnuts take as Gospel?

Wednesday, September 09, 2009

Friday, September 04, 2009

About That Facebook Meme

I, along with several million of my Facebook Phriends published this as our status message over the past 24 hours.
"No one should die because they cannot afford health care, and no one should
go broke because they get sick. If you agree, please post this as your status
for the rest of the day."
It is a way to both show support for the health care reform efforts currently underway and to reinforce the message that there are people in this country who do not share your circumstances and that assumptions about the level of health insurance coverage often ring false.

If you disagree with the message above it is easy enough to show that as well. Post to your Facebook status for a day. Let your message toll out for all the world to see. I'll even rewrite the meme so that you can play along. Just post this.
"It's too bad if someone should die because they cannot afford health care
but it would cost too much for me and I don't really know those people.
And if someone should go broke because they get sick, well they just need
to suck it up because they can't count on loyalty from their employer. I
just don't want to hear about them. If you agree, please post this as your
status for the rest of the day."

That should make you feel better.


"At least I was able to talk the girls out of getting tattoos from the guy
in the trailer who comes around to the bars."

All I want to know is what kind of permits East Dubuque issues for mobile, late-night tat wagons. What are the public hearings like?

Tuesday, August 25, 2009


If your "energy" drink is really as good as they claim, why did you need three of them today?

van Hollen Unfit For His Job?

Someone should check to see if AG Goodhair has his own law degree. If he doesn't know that the courts decide on the constitutionality of laws by now, then perhaps he doesn't deserve to be AG.
Attorney General J.B. Van Hollen said today he won’t defend the state
against a lawsuit...

Let's see what he had to say about a different law.
"It's really the job of the legislature to be making those public policy
decisions," Van Hollen explained. "It's not the job of the Dept. of Justice, or
the courts."
Again, he's wrong. But this time in the opposite direction. Even business owners are critical of van Hollen's handling of the Minimum Markup Law.
The gas stations had no indication that "the attorney general was planning
to throw the case—until he did so by failing to appeal," Posner added.
At any rate, if he's not up to upholding the law he's probably not gubernatorial material, either. But if he does decide to run, I offer up this slogan to Fraley, free of charge. "JB van Hollen. He's in the tank already."

Monday, August 24, 2009

So? How Do You Feel?

How's your self-esteem, knowing that as of this morning you have just as many NFL first downs in 2009 as Brett "Purple Reign" Favre?

Saturday, August 22, 2009

Thoughts On Favre's First Purple Reign

When I heard this
How Favre's arrival affects [John David] Booty remains to be seen, other
than he gave up his No. 4 jersey. Now wearing No. 9, Booty said he gladly handed
over his jersey number and laughed when asked if he received any financial

I couldn't help but think of this.
Let's go back up to my office and talk about this like two reasonable
Does that make me a bad person? (It's pronounced Big Boo-tay.)

If Favre is really committed to this whole, "running out the string," thingie, shouldn't he be learning how to kick field goals, too?

If you want to learn how to say, "Whatever," using only body language check out the tape of Tarvaris Jackson being congratulated by Brent after his touchdown pass. That cold shoulder could freeze the tundra again.

Friday, August 21, 2009

Bachmann Calls For An End To Regulation Of Abortions

Do you suppose that even she listens to what she says anymore?
"That's why people need to continue to go to the town halls, continue to
melt the phone lines of their liberal members of Congress," said Bachmann, "and
let them know, under no certain circumstances will I give the government control over my body and my health care decisions."

Thursday, August 20, 2009

Tommy! Decides To Explore The "Stassen Limit"

How do you tell that it's getting close to being a punchline? This gets really close.

Is it going to be mayor of Elroy? Is it going to be the United States
Senate? Is it going to be governor? Whatever the case may be, I feel I've got
one more good strong campaign still within me, and I still love politics,"

At least it would be entertaining to watch Neumann and Walker trying to take swipes at the old duffer. Walker says that the stimulus isn't helping "real people." Tommy! understands who those real people are in ways that Walker and his team never could.

Tuesday, August 18, 2009

Dear Senator Erpenbach

You know we love you, John. Right? You are our guy. Just don't confuse that with a mandate to run for Governor. It's not going to be pretty and I don't think you've got the edge that it's going to take to beat Neumann.

Just stay as our Senator and we can all be happy.

Monday, August 17, 2009

A Modest Proposal

Or we can all agree that Mayor Barrett would have been safer if his Security detail had been with him at the Fair. That would have short-cicuited the situation without endangering the infant in the middle of the dispute.

What's the chances that the "Shoot 'em all" crowd would sign off on that?

Pre-Existing Condition?

Rick Perlstein in the WaPo:

The tree of crazy is an ever-present aspect of America's flora. Only now,
it's being watered by misguided he-said-she-said reporting and taking over the
forest. Latest word is that the enlightened and mild provision in the draft
legislation to help elderly people who want living wills -- the one hysterics
turned into the "death panel" canard -- is losing favor,
according to the Wall Street Journal, because of "complaints over the provision."

Good thing our leaders weren't so cowardly
in 1964, or we would never have passed a civil rights bill -- because of
complaints over the provisions in it that would enslave whites.

From Teh Twitter: Neil Gaiman

neilhimselfFor the
record, perhaps because I'm from the UK, I think healthcare is a human right,
like education . Not something to make companies rich.

So which is it? Is the purpose of healthcare to line the pockets of companies or is it, as the Constitution says, "promote the general welfare, and secure the blessings of liberty to ourselves and our posterity..?"

Can America secure the blessings of Liberty to our posterity if we consign them to a second-rate status in which only the wealthy receive healthcare?

Friday, August 14, 2009

Channelling Jimmy Fallon

TO has changed teams and come out with a new breakfast cereal. Straight from his website, His Humbleness describes them as the second coming of Flutie Flakes.
Terrell Owens has his own reality television show and millions of
followers on Twitter and, now, his own cereal. T.O.’s — as his cereal is called
— will be coming to a Tops store near you, if they haven’t

PLB Sports, the Pittsburgh-based firm that introduced Flutie Flakes a
decade ago, this week began rolling out Owens’ cereal, which will be sold
exclusively in Tops stores.

Made of honey nut toasted oats, T.O.’s come in a collector’s box that
features Owens on the cover. On the back is an image of a Bills helmet-clad
Owens pouring the cereal onto his face, paying homage to his catch phrase,
“Getchya popcorn ready.”

Fallon says that the interesting thing is that each box will be marked, "Best if Used Before 2004."

Monday, August 10, 2009

I Hope It Was For More Than One Recipe

The couple in front of me at Hy-Vee yesterday had one Diet Pepsi, one bag of brown sugar, six cans of Alpo and 31 pounds of butter in their cart.

If Pierre Trudeau Was Around He Wouldn't Put Up With Calling It That

The Three Amigos Summit

Lucky Day: Oh,
great. You killed the invisible swordsman!

Saturday, August 08, 2009

What Happens When I Go AFK

DPW sues Kapanke over stealth campaign events.

SP lauds MB's stand against health care reform.

Scooter gets chummy with Newt and Jebber.

Even the chunderheads at MJS can see that JA is wrong.

What a helluva vacation.

Thursday, August 06, 2009

A Party Gone Topsy-Turvy

How messed up does a party have to be to define a Mark Neumann/Rick Wiley partnership as their moderate choice? Neumann announced that Wiley would be leading his campaign for Governor according to The Dallas News.
Sadosky said that Sullivan and Wiley, who will become a top consultant to
Mark Neumann's gubernatorial campaign in Wisconsin, have similar strengths and

Why did Wiley leave his last job as Kay Bailey Hutchison's campaign manager in her run against Texas Gov Rick Perry?
Campaign officials said former leader Rick Wiley is leaving because a recent
health problem requires that he reduce the high stress and avoid the hectic pace
of managing a large campaign.

So Wiley figures that the Walker/Neumann tussle in Wisconsin won't have the hectic pace of a large campaign, that it'll be a laid-back walk in the park? I thought he was more savvy than that.

Wednesday, August 05, 2009

Open Carry Aerobics

Another "responsible" gun owner protects himself from the government. Or something.
A Web page linked to Sodini includes his writings. The author writes about
years of rejection by women, struggles with alcohol and an earlier shooting
attempt at the same gym in which he said he "chickened out."

Auntie Paula Won't Be Coming This Year

Because Cousin Ryan was mean to her. Or something.
"With sadness in my heart, I've decided not to return to IDOL. I'll miss
nurturing all the new talent, but most of all being a part of a show that I
helped from day 1
become an international phenomenon," the statement said on
Abdul's verified Twitter account.

Tuesday, August 04, 2009

Once again the Just Desserts Volunteer Recognition biennial event is being planned to honor and thank the many people who volunteer countless hours to make our community better.

This event is free and open to everyone. Desserts and refreshments will be served.

The event recognizes and honors all volunteers and community spirit. The nominated winners will be recognized individually during the awards ceremony. Please pass this on to your friends so they may nominate someone and attend the event too!

We need your nominations of people, organizations, and/or businesses that should be recognized for their community spirit of volunteerism! The 2009 Just Desserts Event will take place on September 10th at 7 pm. The location will be announced. Nominations are due by August 28th.


Just Desserts - Nomination Form

Nominate any person, organization or business for their volunteerism and service within the greater Evansville area. Let’s give them their Just Desserts!

Person/ Business / Organization nominated to receive their Just Desserts.

Name _______________________________________________________________

Address _____________________________________________________________

Telephone _________________email address: _______________________________

Nominated by: individual or business/ organization.? (circle one)

Person completing form ___________________________________________________

Organization name (if applicable)______________________________________________

Address ________________________________________________________________

Telephone ___________________email address:________________________________

1. List your nominees’ volunteer activities in the organization / community. (Use the back of this sheet or a separate paper for more complete answers.)

2. Why do you think this person should be recognized?

3. Please give us an interesting example or story about your nominee that illustrates their dedication and volunteer work. (Note: this may be shared with others at the recognition.)

4. Additional comments or information.

Mail to: Evansville Community Partnership (ECP), PO Box 321, Evansville, WI. 53536
Drop off at 8 W. Main Street, Evansville, WI -882-0598
Nominations due by: August 28, 2009

Some Good News About WWT Facility

Yesterday it was announced that Evansville would be getting about $4M in Federal Stimulus Funds toward the refitting of the Wastewater Treatment Facility. Today comes this from and WCLO.
Evansville is receiving about $4 million in federal stimulus money for water
infrastructure projects.
The money is matched by the state's Clean Water
Revolving Loan Fund, totalling about $8.1 million for upgrades to the wastewater
treatment plant, sanitary sewers and lift station.

Work already accomplished across the city has multiplied efficiency and cut waste. This next step, to meet new US standards, will be good for all users.

Monday, August 03, 2009

Shining Light On The Ugliness

Two of the big-time bloggers over at Rightviewwi discuss the nuances of race relations in America.
The cop and the tapes and witness's seem to be having no
problem defending themselves from your typical arrogant black lib. The one who
should be in trouble is the lady who called the cops in the first place. Next
time she see's someone she thinks is breaking in she should just mind her own
business. Maybe Gates will get killed in his house then we can listen to the
lefties whine about no cops being around. The cop was following procedure, dumb black bastard figures he's way to special to be bugged by a middle
class white cop

Posted by: buck Wednesday, July 29, 2009 at 08:12 AM

Buck: Again, words of wisdom. Thank
And for all those out there suffering "white mans guilt" - get
over it. Here is a perfect incident that shows racism works both ways.
African-Americans can actually be racist - whodathunkit? Thanks Obama and Gates
for providing a perfect example that will stand up to all the usual whining from

Posted by: Amy L. Geiger-Hemmer Wednesday, July 29, 2009 at 01:06 PM

Through The Looking Glass

Okay, stay with me on this one because it's every bit as convoluted as we've come to expect from Sarah Palin and her groupies.

Apparently some Internet sites had headlines that said Todd and the newly resigned Governor were divorcing. I'll have to take the Sarah supporter's word for it because she provides no links. I didn't see this rumor until I saw it denied on the Sarah Palin Blog.

It looks as if no one did, and here's where it gets all Palin-y. The blogger says she doesn't want to hear that none of the Main Stream (sic) Media reported the story.
*** UPDATE *** I have read on several sites and here on this blog comments
that the Main Stream Media never picked up the Palin divorce story. Well, not
exactly true. Many MSM organizations were quick to publish the story after they
got a denial from Sarah Palin's attorneys and/or the statement from Meghan
Stapleton - but understand THAT is still going with the story. It becomes a "Do
you beat your wife?" story. Make the accusation - force a denial - and then the
story is out there.

Nevermind that the MSM never made the accusation. By printing SP's denial (which made this a news story) then the MSM was persecuting the quitter's family.

Think about how twisted this is. SP denies an Internet rumor to the press and then berates the press for publishing their release. Tell me again why anyone should listen to a single word this woman says.

Friday, July 31, 2009

Big Papi Is Amazed

The rest of us have to settle for being appalled. When will we get a real commissioner?

At this point I'd even seetle for a Commish Bush. He liked the baseball thing and it was his one endeavor that he was moderately capable at.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

On Distribution

It wasn't so very long ago that a piece of human detritus like Glenn Beck or Lou Dobbs would have been dependent on a retyped mailing list, a mimeograph machine and clear channel (small c) radio to get his fevered ravings out.

Now they get airtime in our homes every night. Ain't it grand?
Lou Dobbs suggested on his radio show this past Wednesday, right before
the Gates flare-up, that Obama
be an illegal immigrant
, tying this into his usual preoccupation.
"I'm starting to think we have a document issue," Dobbs said. "You suppose he's
un-- no, I won't even use the word 'undocumented,' it wouldn't be

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Ron White On Robert Gates

"Mr. White, you are being charged with drunk in public-K!" I was like,
"Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey! I was drunk in a bar! They, threw me into
public-K! I don't want to be drunk in public! I wanna be drunk in a bar, which
is perfectly legal! Arrest them!"

The cop asked him to step out onto the porch and then arrested him for being disorderly in front of the neighbors. The lawyers will have a field day with this if it isn't smoothed soon.

Deep Thought

About Gratitude

When they're really in trouble, personal, life-shattering trouble, they don't go looking for a tax-cutter or a budget-slasher. They head straight for the office of the sneakiest lawyer they can find.

And then they bad-mouth the lawyers as soon as he gets them off.

Blogger Asks Questions About Walker's Scouting Accomplishments

Kevin at Lakeshore Laments poses a theory of his own about Walker's CV.
[snip]...ask to see if Walker's Eagle Scout project was completed, or that all of
his merit badges were earned.

But he firmly holds that Walker doesn't have to show proof of his Wisconsin lineage to be elected Governor. It's as if he can't tell if it's a joke or not.

Vick Back In NFL

The dogfighting circuit has yet to rule on his return.

Monday, July 27, 2009

Just For The Record

I was in front of the curve on this one. It's just that, when you tweet to yourself, ...[sigh]
Check the date.

Wolves...From Helicopters

"By the way, Hollywood needs to know: We eat, therefore we hunt."

Ex-Celebrity, Sarah Palin

Friday, July 24, 2009

Suddenly, My Purpose In Life Became Clear

Hi, Jim Brooks.

Michele Bachmann (BachmannforMN6) is
now following your updates on Twitter.

See The King and I Today Then Go See It Tonight

The King and I continues tonight and Friday at the High School PAC. Tickets in advance at Piggly Wiggly or the Evansville Pharmacy are just $10. Twelve dollars at the door is still a bargain. See the ECT website for details.

In the meantime...

Friday, July 17, 2009

Neumann On Alternative Fuels

Jay Weber posts a Neumann statement that rambles down both sides of the highway, both supporting ethanol and rejecting it depending on circumstances. What caught my eye was this little bit of waffling.
Again, to be very clear, I do not to my knowledge even know anyone tied to
the ethanol issue. No one is pushing me because of the ethanol

Hell, I'm not running for Governor and I know dozens of people tied to the ethanol issue in one form or another. Neumann might want to do a little catching up before he starts going in front of live microphones.

Monday, July 13, 2009


Last night.
"I asked myself, "What would Jesus do? So, I plowed his lawn with salt,
set him on fire and sent him to Hell. It worked out nicely."

Friday, July 10, 2009

It's Just A Southern Thing

You wouldn't understand.
Unresolved disputes concerning the Confederate flag have led the ACC to move
three future baseball tournaments out of South Carolina.

A Violation Of Rule #1

Don't be a dick.

Saturday, July 04, 2009

Can You Imagine?

Just think of the reaction if the headlines had read...

Governor Doyle resigns to concentrate on higher office.


JB van Hollen gives up AG post to concentrate on Governor run.


Walker believes he can better serve the people of Milwaukee County by resigning.

Even though that last one could be true there is no serious politician who would believe that walking away from your sworn duty for reasons you cannot explain shows anything but poor judgement.

On Political Career Choices

Bob Harris
Sarah Palin resigning as governor of Alaska to position herself for the
White House is like Limahl leaving Kajagoogoo so his solo career could

Happy July 4

We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union,establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

Yeah. I'm Old. So What?

One of the bands that I've seen more than once in person. Ladies and gentlemen...Uriah Heep!

Monday, June 29, 2009

The Path To Invasive Species Is Paved With Good Intentions

In the wake of this Gazette story over the weekend comes an email from a loyal reader.
People trying to help revive Lake Leota could be endangering the newly
refilled lake.

DNR Conservation Warden Boyd Richter has cited one person for
releasing fish in Lake Leota. The person who was caught got a $1,133
ticket, Richter said.

Reader PC writes:
Maybe The Happy Circumstance can help remind people that we need to
keep things like VHS, Eurasian watermillfoil and the rusty crayfish out of Lake
Leota as long as possible. Things are not like they were in the 1950's. We are
dealing with very serious problems with our lakes.

Gibbs lake is a poster child for Eurasian watermillfoil and is about 7
miles from Leota as the crow flies.Everyone should go take a good look at the
millfoil problem in Gibbs lake. It only takes a small piece to introduce it to a
new body of water.

We all have a part to play in keeping the lakes clean. It can sometimes start with the things we don't do.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

A Most Unfortunate Brand Name

From the BBC comes a tale of an oil venture with (ahem) attitude.

Russia's energy giant Gazprom has signed a $2.5bn (£1.53bn) deal with
Nigeria's state operated NNPC, to invest in a new joint venture.

The new firm, to be called Nigaz, is set to build refineries, pipelines and gas power
stations in Nigeria.

Displaying One's Shortcomings

Former mayor in Georgia arrested for nudity

And, for those who get all bent out of shape over party affiliations being listed, it doesn't (ahem) come that he's a Republican until the second-last graph.

Joe The Plumber In Wisconsin

You just knew that getting JtP into a saloon would be good for a few laughs and last night didn't disappoint.

Christopher Magiera, a board member of Americans for Prosperity, got things off to a rollicking start even though he seemed to be off-message. He couldn't quite get to a violation of Godwin's Law from where he started. Described by the Wausau Herald as a local political activist, Magiera said
[that] he saw a "Stalinization of America" taking place and that "the only
thing that separates Stalinist Russia from what we have in Washington right now
are the re-education and death camps."
Apparently, no one in the crowd, estimated at whopping 75, actually knew enough about Stalinist Russia to call him on his comparison. But then it was time for the main act to take the center ring. Joe the Pretend Plumber said in an interview

[that] a recent Time magazine report that he had left the
Republican Party was false.

“No, that’s not true,” he said. “I said I was thinking about it, but I
did not do it. Right now, they don’t represent me as a Republican. I’m still
thinking about it, to a degree, because we need to promote America — not
Republicans, not Democrats.”

But the big news was that Joe has moved on to calling for vigilante justice and lynch mobs.
Referring to Sen. Chris Dodd, D-Conn., more than once, Wurzelbacher asked,
"Why hasn't he been strung up?"
It's as if he was at one with Daddio who has taken to calling for a shooting war over healthcare reform. Even the reliably conservative Herald has had nearly enough of the media-created Joe-Monster.
[ ] he glosses over facts. Referring to the Constitution as "almost like the
Bible," Wurzelbacher said of the Founding Fathers: "They knew socialism doesn't
work. They knew communism doesn't work." The Constitution predates the origins of socialism by nearly 100 years.
His fifteen minutes long ago used up, Wurzelbacher needs to be progressively more outrageous just to remain in the spotlight. He has become the Republican's very own Sandra Bernhard, a once-upon-a-time minor celebrity with an act that was never very much fun to begin with trying to play out the string.

Capper has more on the conservative disarray in Marathon County. They've become a sort of joke but they're still looking to Pennsylvania for punchlines.

Updated after Tomah on Friday:

Joe says states should be able to ban smoking and that he'd rather be fishing than trundling about with the AFP sideshow.

The once famous Wurzelbacher, technically neither Joe nor Plumber, put in an appearance at Ed Thompson's TeePee Supper Club (Motto: Great prime rib. Common stereotypes) for another 70 people. That put his crowds at a total of 150 for Wausau and Tomah together. That's Walker territory, there but a far cry from the hundreds that saw him when he was stumping with Grampy.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

From Race Bannon To Race-Baiting. 45 Years OF Jonny Quest

The intertubes are a wonderful place. You can find most anything out there. There is a two-hour documentary about one of my favorite shows available in sections on YouTube.

One of the great joys from my distant childhood was watching "Jonny Quest." We had to go to a neighbor's house to watch it on their color TV but the trip was richly rewarded. Exotic locales, strange villains and the hint of smoky sex between Race and Jade were heady stuff indeed for a pre-pubescent boy.

Quest was one of the few shows to seen on all three networks during its run. It hangs on today in late-night showings on Adult Swim on the Cartoon Network. It has the to-be-expected high level of 60's violence that would never pass for kid's programming today.

Chapter 12 of the documentary deals with some of the little known facts of the show.

But it is Chapter 13 that deals with some truly uncomfortable realities about the 1960's. It shows the cutting of racist dialogue that has been done for the various CD releases and asks the question, "Can we learn from a past that we simply pretend never happened?"

It is in the comments to this episode that we get a clear view of how much work remains to be done before we can claim that racism has been wiped out in America.
A suggestion to malcontent white hating racists: let those races move in who
the white devils 'killed" upon white US colonization, Kick out all of the
liberals and make room for the heathen monkeys so they can have 'their" land
back and cultural backwardness, Let the US again be a melting pot for pagan and
backward cultures, tee pees spear chuckers, fire dancers, ring noses, camel
jockeys and all the other loser cultures that liberals protect and tout in
history books. Watch Apocalypto moron.

We have along ways to go if a cartoon can draw out this much ignorance.

May We Stipulate?

Can we just adopt as a working assumption that Perez Hilton is an attention whore whose proclamations deserve no more than a cursory dismissal?

Friday, June 26, 2009

I Have Raffle Tickets If You Need Them

Celebrate a Lake Leota 4th

Fireworks Prime Seating Raffle

Tickets are $5 each or 5 for $20

Enter our raffle to win four reserved seats on top of the Warming House to view the fireworks show on July 4th. The best seating in the park, and hassle free. No need to bring chairs or blankets down early to reserve your spot. Just show up that evening and your chairs are reserved and waiting for you.

We will draw 10 winners the night of July 2nd after the Lake Grand Reopening Ceremony. Tickets are $5 each or 5 for $20. Maximum of 500 tickets will be sold. All proceeds go towards paying for the fireworks show. Support your local fireworks show by entering to win the best seats in the park!

4th of July Schedule at

Evansville 4th of July Committee · Evansville Community Partnership, Inc

Thursday, June 25, 2009

A Couple Of Pointers For Teh Noobs

If you think they'll come looking for you, leaving your car at the airport is a tip-off to them.

If your plan for avoiding your troubles includes "Escape to South America," you'd be best to not buy a round-trip ticket.

If you intend to make things better by apologizing you need to start with the wife you've betrayed. Apologizing to the mistress or blaming the media isn't going to make it better at the breakfast table.

If you're going to blather about the sanctity of marriage you need to start with your own.

Tuesday, June 23, 2009

Perhaps, The Perfect Joke For Our Time

From Bob Zany this morning.

Alaska was hit by an earthquake that measured 4.5 on the Richter Scale over the weekend. Governor Palin is demanding that David Letterman apologize for saying that her daughter was knocked down by the quake.

Monday, June 22, 2009

Rep Bachmann Vows To Push Stupidity To Criminal Level

"I know for my family the only question we will be answering is how
many people are in our home," said Bachmann, who warned of corrupt ACORN
involvement in the census. "We won't be answering any information beyond that,
because the Constitution doesn't require any information beyond

In fact, as a Census Bureau spokeswoman told the Washington Times,
what Bachmann just announced she would do is a crime punishable by a fine of up
to $5,000.

What's the opposite of, "Stand up and be counted?

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Wait A Darned Minute

Aren't those the same people who were just saying that we shouldn't be talking to Iran?

Friday, June 19, 2009

The Voice Of A Generation Is Gravely Ill

It's hard to be too sad for a man who has had a great 92 year run but this is still hard news to see.
Legendary CBS anchorman Walter Cronkite, 92, long known as the "Most Trusted
Man in America," is gravely ill, according to multiple CBS News sources and
published reports.

Watching the work of a giant like Cronkite just serves to show the light weight of many of today's journalists.

Godspeed, Mr Cronkite.

Through The Looking Glass

Bruce Murphy and Mayor Barrett are both backing McBride who will, no doubt, claim in contradiction to the facts that those mean old Liberals are out to get her.

Journalists' ethics take a hit...again thanks to the Lecturer in Journalists' Ethics.

It gives another new meaning to the note on McBride's blogs: "Access granted by invitation only."

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Scene From A Summer Night

Down at the gas station parking lot. Young stud on a hot bike is talking to a PYT while her friend leans against their car. PYT stands hipshot and grinning while the friend looks bored beyond belief.

The air smells of warm asphalt and the tang of gasoline and glows blue in the light of the canopy lights. For just a moment thirty-five years fell away from me.

Life is good.

No. I Ain't Feeling It

I probably won't start a recall campaign against Jim Sullivan for his vote on the budget. That'd be stupid.

The One Thing It Doesn't Mean

It doesn't matter if you're talking about a household, a corporation or a municipality. When a budget writer says, "Everything is on the table this time," the one thing of which you can be sure is that everything is not on the table.

Monday, June 15, 2009

Insert Heavy Sigh Here

One of my new Astronomy classmates wondered why, if Betelgeuse was so big, it didn't come between Earth and Jupiter periodically.

Another said she was taking the class because she wants to know more about Ares. She was born in Ares and wants to get a tattoo of the constellation but she's taking the class so she knows what it looks like before she does.

I despair.

Painting Himself Into A Corner

It's one thing to hope for the failure of the President it's quite another to position yourself at a point where the only way you can be vindicated is to hope for an attack on the US.

How To Make Their Heads Explode

Want some good sport? Just sneak up behind one of the red-meat true-believers and say, "Governor Baldwin."

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

Of Course It Was a "Dump" Truck

I got stuck behind a truck this morning that sported two messages on its endgate.

First was
"Save WI. Vote Doyle Out Now."
I presume that was his view of statewide politics. His other message was his own self-assessment.
"Old, Slow, and In The Way."
A clear realization of the Party of No.

Classless Busch

Check your outrage, not my spelling. This is a different classless Busch. But thanks for thinking of the ex.
See, it wasn't just any guitar that Busch whacked three times against the
ground before tossing the chipped steel instrument aside. No, it was a revered
Gibson Les Paul guitar that had been hand-painted by longtime NASCAR artist Sam Bass and has become the symbol of Nashville Speedway.

One of the worst insults my father used was to call someone a horse's ass. I heard his voice Saturday night.

Tuesday, June 09, 2009

Open Carry Picnic

Emphasis mine.
Since Obama has been president, the NRA has been getting what it wants,
no regulations and a censoring of reasonable, thoughtful debate. Meanwhile, the
children in Chicago keep getting mowed down, with three dozen school-age
children killed so far this year.
Chicago police Superintendent Jody
Weis told CNN, "Take weapons such as assault rifles out of an urban area. I just
don't see a need for an assault rifle in the City of Chicago."

When Education Secretary Arne Duncan was running the Chicago public
schools, he told CNN, "If that happened to one of Chicago's wealthiest suburbs,
and God forbid it ever did, but if it was a child being shot dead every
two weeks
. . . do you think the status quo would remain? There's no
way it would. All hell would break loose."

Prima Donnas At Play

Pete says that Sarah can't play in the same sandbox as Newt.
It’s the story of the day that GOP leaders have been battling over who’s to
blame for the fact that Palin was “snubbed” when she was disinvited from a
speaking role at the big fundraiser, which is for the two Congressional
committees, the NRCC and the NRSC. Politico
the blame
on NRCC chief Sessions, claiming he didn’t want her to
upstage keynote speaker
, prompting a round of bitter finger-pointing.

Rush and Hugh don't want anybody to play with the General.
"In the effort to reverse this lurch beyond the farthest left fringe of
previous Democratic statist urges, individual Americans have a role to play.
They have to say no to GM products and services until such time as the
denationalization occurs," says
. He acknowledges that this is a serious step that could hurt
people currently working for GM: "But there isn't any alternative,

The Party of kNOw, indeed. It's as if they have a pathological need to be loudly wrong.