Getting To The Bottom Of Softness Claims

A Toilet Paper Analyst (try to not think about it too much) has said that claims of a new "softer" tp may be bogus.

Industry analyst Bill Schmitz is skeptical. He said extra layers make toilet
paper stronger, not softer, although he said Georgia Pacific may have added
extra fibers for softness.

What brought this about?

[ ] a team of them at Georgia Pacific's Innovation Institute in
Neenah has come up with a three-ply version of its Quilted Northern
product.

The new product will be launched Monday. The company touts the
toilet tissue as "ultra-soft" and says it plans to market the product to women
45 and older who view their bathroom as a "sanctuary for quality
time."

Wait just a dang minute here. If women over 45 are looking to invade the sanctity of the sanctum will men over 45 be forced back out to the taverns? This could be a disaster.